When You want Me, You got Me where You want Me again
Hello everyone. Haven’t we all had fun since we last got in touch?
Lots of exciting news and events to bring to your attention, and we are
particularly pleased to announce the availability now of tickets for the
fabulous Lumb Farm Ashes Spectacular. Tickets? Did we say tickets? Up
and down the land, po-faced anarchos and crusties tremble at the thought
of being asked to part with hard cash in return for musical entertainment.
The ‘pay no more than 50p for this record’ brigade bridle
at the thought, and all the promoters who ever paid us peanuts for doing
a hunt-sab benefit groan in dismay. More of this anon, but while we’re
on the subject of hunt-sab benefits, it is only now it occurs to us that
as Fox Hunting is now illegal, the whole campaign must have been successful,
and consequently all those hard-working musicians Kissingered into playing
the dratted events should have some credit. In fact, after that last one
in Sunderland when we lugged the PA up and down nine flights of stairs
with no help from the organisers and support bands, I think that we should
take all the credit. Henceforth, if anyone asks you how fox hunting became
illegal, tell them that Blyth Power did it…
Ironic really, since few people could possibly care less, but there we
are. This is not important, and we need to focus instead on the main event
of this news letter, which is of course the caption competition. It was,
as any fule kno, lofty lyrical genius Prince. For this month’s pearls
we focus a little closer to home – but only a little – and
the usual indifference will be accorded anyone coming up with the right
answer faster than either Mr. John Hilditch or Swag.
We could, we could crash, we could, we could, bum bum
The Blyth Ashes then! We know a lot of people have been waiting and wondering,
and we are now pleased to launch the event officially – which is
a polite way of saying shell out or we’ll lose our shirts. Here’s
the deal. Wristbands are now on sale for the event priced at £15
each with admission free to anyone under 18, and this paltry sum will
allow you three night’s camping, as well as the whole shindig, which
is going to be particularly glorious. In case anyone missed the last mailout,
or the notice on the website, this year’s Ashes festival will take
place at Lumb Farm, near Ripley in Derbyshire, over the weekend of August
15th – 17th. Plans are currently as follows:
We have the place booked from Friday through to Sunday, with the campsite
still booked for the Sunday night – although the toilets will be
packing up on the Sunday, so once the venue shuts up for the night campers
may have to either hold their water or wee in traditional fashion. Blyth
Power aim to be on site around lunchtime, and we reckon to have music
kicking off after tea. Friday is usually a leisurely affair, and with
the music all taking place indoors we hope to be able to avoid panic,
confusion, and delay. Music will continue until bedtimeish – actual
times to be confirmed but it won’t go on ‘til stupid O’clock
as we are old and no longer in our prime. Running orders are yet to be
scheduled, but in days of old we made Friday night acoustic – this
will probably not be the case now we are indoors in a hired room and don’t
have to fanny about making sure we don’t upset sensitive landlords/ladies
and their weird local customers.
Saturday will kick off with the music late morning, and no doubt we will
all rock until after lunch, at which point we will retire to play cricket
in the designated area – there is actually enough space this year
– and we are confident that the new challenge of playing Jessi’s
Eastfield team will not be too taxing.
A couple of points about the cricket – in recent years we had to
curtail the activity to the disappointment of many, as space shrank, and
it simply became impossible. Lumb Farm will offer unparalleled opportunities
to strut our stuff, and while we hope no one will take it too seriously,
we hope the ‘hit it over the fence and you’re out’ rule
may be dispensed with henceforth.
We would also like to take time to pay our respects and thanks to Mr.
Chris from Bishop’s Stortford, our adversary for so many years at
Ufford and Tallington. Thanks for loaning the bat all those years Chris,
and we hope to see you around somewhere! Memo to self… must bring
own bat this time.
Saturday afternoon will reconvene with music after the cricket, and the
Galaxy of Stars appended below will continue to regale you all until bed
time (to be announced) at which point we will retire to our cots and dream
sweet dreams. Blyth Power will wind up the night, with a set of sedate
lullabies, and hopefully their sobriety and steadfast adherence to professional
standards will encourage everyone to buy lots more CDs. You know you want
them all.
Sunday morning will see us all fresh, clean and shiny and ready for more,
so music will kick off late morning and reach its crescendo around 3pm
with the climax of a sedate Sunday set from Blyth Power again. Please
don’t throw buns.
Catering, toilets and showers should all be trouble free and salubrious,
although when we checked the showers out they were communal gym-type affairs,
so you might want to bring a thong if you are shy (no, please don’t).
We are talking about catering with the venue, and there should be good
affordable meals available for everyone when they want them, without the
kind of queues and unpleasant language that typified an attempt at ordering
egg and chips at Tallington.
So, hopefully we won’t lose The Ashes, we’ll all have super
fun, and get to see each other again after all this time. Bands/musicians/weird
mutants confirmed for the weekend are:
Asbo Derek, Pog, Chris Butler, L. Morgan, Eastfield, Deacon, Paul Carter,
New York Scum Haters, Mark Hibbett, Alcohol Licks, Wob, Verbal Warning,
Lying Scotsman, Blyth Power, The Charlies, Phil Doleman, Red Wedding,
Cracktown, Amateur Ninja Club, Rachel Pantechnicon, Kevin 2 Sheds and
Henry Lawrence.
Which is pretty much a galaxy of awesome stars when you come to think
of it. Mr. Henry Lawrence is interested in hearing from anyone who would
like to join him in a ‘fellow travellers’ performance. Anyone
who is planning on going anyway and would like to perform can propose
some material on the website, and other interested parties can then learn
it at home and turn up and join in. Sounds like a recipe for the bizarre.
The link is: http://uk.groups.yahoo.com/group/fellow_travellers
On a final note, then, let’s all try and see this not so much as
an event organised by Blyth Power, but something we’re all going
to do together. We’ll be paying for it, and if if it all goes pear
shaped naturally we will weep and rend our garments, but as all the people
likely to receive this are good eggs we are confident there won’t
be too much haggling on the day. Anyone who thinks it’s too expensive
and still thinks 7” singles cost 50p can stay at home and listen
to them. We would appreciate any offers of assistance with the organisation
and running of the thing, so anyone who wants to help get in touch. We
won’t have radios and yellow vests, but stage management and doing
the door will be easier with a few extra helpers.
Drop us a line. We Hope to see you all there.
Has anybody ever told you, it's not coming true?
OK, I know we’ve been blathering on about this for months, but Mr.
Porter has indeed now finished three novels, and the first will be out
soon. The Bricklayer’s Arms will be available by the end of the
Summer. We’ve paid hard cash up front by way of production costs,
and all we need now are the finished cover design, and for the illustrious
author to get his finger out and finish the final revision. There is some
confusing chronology in the middle which needs a little pruning, thereafter
it will be on sale in glorious paperback. It is, of course, the book about
Benjamin Jonson, so don’t expect confessions of an anarcho-punk
rock drummer or anything along those lines. Watch this space.
While on the subject of new stock – we haven’t any at the
moment, although we are down to the last 3 copies of Viking Station and
need to reprint it – there are rumours of a vinyl re-issue of the
original Touch of Harry cassette recording. This is being undertaken with
our knowledge and co-operation. Lord knows why anyone would want such
a thing, but it will be a limited edition of around 500, and less representative
of the band’s current sound than almost anything we can think of.
Go wild.
I cancel Sunday Cancel Monday Don't look at me
Just when you thought it might never happen again, Blyth Power accepted
some bookings! Crikey! There will be a number of band and solo appearances
this year, and they kick of in Sheffield at the Boardwalk on Thursday
June 5th with a solo set in the company of Attila the Stockbroker. The
band will be appearing at Glastonwick on July 5th, at which event we believe
Mr. Porter may also be standing in as drummer for Eastfield, so hurry
hurry! Book now to avoid disappointment. Hurry also to Portsmouth on July
26th, where the full band will also be appearing against all the odds.
Not so strange – anyone paying enough to cover the huge baby-sitting
bill can have us anytime!
Mr. Porter will be touring solo briefly after Lumb Farm with Pog and the
very wonderful Curry-Eating Philip Jeays and his band. This jolly package
will be well worth a handful of any currency to come and see, so don’t
be shy! Blyth Power are also down for Otley Folk Festival this year. Details
are to be arranged, but it’s on the Saturday, for the usual reasons
of baby-sitting that are now our blanket get-out clause for anything (‘can
you do my countryside Alliance/hunting/gun lobby benefit in Wrexham for
£30…’ ). Not that we need one these days – it’s
just sometimes easier than saying ‘no get stuffed.’ Blyth
are playing three times (!) and TDL is also threatening an appearance.
Am I the only Sour Cherry on the Fruit stand
Finally, then, if you want to keep in touch a little more then you can
drag your self over to My Space – or Blyth Power’s space at
www.myspace.com/blythpower56134 - and drop us a line. It’s an amazing
concept this science, and since we opened it a number of old faces have
popped up. Strange really, as we have had an enormous website for yonks,
and the digitally challenged Dear Leader had only just come to terms with
that. Don’t expect too much complicated interaction on the site
from him, though, as it will be another decade before his tiny mind can
navigate his way through the URLs to find it.
We are no longer privy to the thoughts of Madame Chairman Meeow, as due to circumstances beyond our control (i.e. allergic children) she has decamped to live with a pleasant cat-happy lady in a village outside Harrogate, where she will eke out her days in child-free splendour.