Light Up The Stage For The Lovers Of Outrage
Once again it's that happy time of the year. The time when we, the ruthless management of the Blyth Mailing List, unleash the auto-destruct programme on those of you who have not renewed your membership, and eradicate you from the memory banks. Once again then, check the expiry date on your envelope and if needs be, drop us a line to sign yourself up for another two years. Alternatively you could ignore this, drop off the list, and then turn up to a gig in eight years time complaining that we stopped sending you the mailouts. The choice is yours.
Unless you are on the fabulous digital e-list, and have accepted the inevitability of progress. Let's face it; the Royal Mail is going the way of vinyl records, and good riddance to both say we, rubbing our hands together in glee at the thought of all the extra profit accrued from the downfall of both. If you're not on the e-list, and have the technology, please sign up now. It's easier, cheaper, and we send out frequent bulletins.
Talking of outdated things going by the board, we hear that famous music paper Melody Maker has been obliged to merge with NME due to a downturn in the market. Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! What a shame.
On a final note, before we launch into the upbeat headline sections, we would like to commend all those old fogies out there who correctly guessed that all the paragraph headings were from The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway by Genesis. Well done chaps. This time we have something a little more up to date to confound you with, and we further invite you to use this edition's headings to spot the link between Blyth Power and The Tygers of Pan Tang. Too easy.

Lost In A Forgotten World Where Ancient Heroes Dwell
First, then, to the subject of live performances, the wheres, the whens and the why were they cancelleds. Miraculously there haven't been any cancellations to apologise for over the past couple of months, but the New Year is kicking in, and no doubt there will be the usual amount of flakiness to contend with. First off the blocks this year is The Earlsdon Cottage in Coventry, which has 'changed management' and 'has no record of your booking'. All the usual excuses. The gig, initially on February 10th is now put back to 9th March but check before you go, as it's not 100% confirmed.
Big news of the moment is the impending show in Harlow on February 2nd. It seems The Square is still hanging in there, although we don't know for how long. This will be the first proper video recording of the band in its current, blissful format, and we hope to see everyone there posing for the cameras. It will be released in due course, so come along and be a part of the greatest audio-visual project ever. Videos aside, if you've never been to The Square, then you're missing out on one of the best live venues around. The sound is immaculate. See you there.
Other dates to watch out for include TDL's solo show at The Grove in Leeds on January 27th. This has been locally advertised as a Mad Dogs & Englishmen date, due to a foul up in the comlinks last year. Thanks to our roving eagle-eyed reporters for letting us know. Joseph is stepping in at very short notice to do the job himself, as the lads are already booked up that night in Newcastle. Solo shows have been v. fun of late, so much so that we've stacked a load into February and March

The Silent Community Is Here To Stay
Matters of the website spring to mind. We have just received, from old chum and record business mogul Mick Penguin, a quantity of data and digital images which will be added to the website in due course as part of the full and frank history of the band which a cabinet reshuffle has now made possible. Due to the ousting of some of the hardliners on the board, we are now in a position to acknowledge our ancient past. Look out soon for lots of ugly mugshots of various band members - including the beautiful Steve Ardcorr - and an approximately truthful blow-by-blow account of the band's life and times. Part of this mighty bequest includes an accurate list of the first 250 gigs, including support bands etc. This, along with the guest book and amazing flash intro, will be forthcoming as soon as time permits.
Hmmm. We were reminded by this pile of ancient history, of former fellow travellers Crass. These were the people responsible for the idiotic idea that the price of records should not keep up with inflation, and consequently we blame them personally for all the drunken crusties who stagger up to us at concerts and complain about the price of our records. Ironically, it seems the Crass collective is in need of a large wedge of cash to stave off eviction. We suggest they ask everyone who ever PAID NO MORE THAN 75p FOR THIS RECORD to send them ten bob. Do they owe us a living? Of course they !*#**!* do!

Life's A Gamble
But not nearly as big a gamble as trying to buy Blyth Power stock from abroad. Here's the deal: Euro cheques are no longer any use, as new banking regulations mean it will cost us a fortune to turn them into hard cash. The best way of ordering stock from abroad is with a credit card, through our internet outlet, Townsend Records. Just go to the website and push the appropriate buttons. If this is not possible, get in touch with us and arrange a bank transfer. If you do want to send a cheque, we'll have to add on a 30% surcharge. Sorry, but that's the way it has to be, as we're already losing out on the postage costs, which have soared over the last couple of years.
Never mind. Not a lot of news on the new stock front. Good news - for us at least - is that both Death Went to Bed and Alnwick & Tyne are down to the last dregs. Neither will be re-issued in any format whatsoever. We might get round to re-recording them one day, but in the meantime, if you want the original then grab it fast. Death Went to Bed, you will recall, was originally only produced as a demo for TDL's solo outings. It is likely that this will be replaced in due course with a more up to date recording for publicity purposes.

Where Spinsters Guard Their Solitude, Their Bodies Rot In Hell
Entirely untopical heading, but what a classic lyric! Just a note here to tell you about the new release from Eastfield. It's a 7" EP featuring six of Mr Jessi Adams' songs from the days of Todd's Peace Box, reworked by the new Eastfield line up. Those of you who attended the Zounds gig in 1992, which celebrated Father Raymond's Birthday, will recall Todd's Peace Box opening the night in a shower of orange vests and fake rubber noses. The record is called Opening the Lid on Todd's Peace Box, and is released on Beat Bedsit records. It is available from Eastfield, Inane, P.O. Box 7804, Birmingham, B13 8AS for £2. Whaddya mean £2? 7" singles should COST NO MORE THAN 75P ACTUALLY. Capitalist-running-dog-lackey-scum!

Nostalgia For an Age Yet to Come
OK pedants. That was technically a cover, but as it came out before the songwriter's own version, and was better, we feel entirely justified in including it as a paragraph header. Here is the big news:
At last we have located a venue for the sorely- missed annual Blyth cricket match. Remember the great days of the Ufford Ashes? Chris from Bash the Bishop's Stortford still has that grubby little jar of fag ends. This year we are going to win them back. The date is the weekend of 18th August. The venue is The Whistle Stop in Tallington, which is a little way north of Peterborough, adjacent to the East Coast Main Line. There is a campsite, real ale, and the prospect of helping Blyth Power regain their honour at the crease. Hurrah! The plan is to bully off around lunchtime on the Saturday with some music, break for the afternoon/early evening to thrash Chris and his team, and then have an evening sitting of more bands and the like. After this, if anyone is in the mood, we can all gather round a Calor gas stove and sing cowboy songs far into the night. More bands will be breaking the Sabbath for a lunchtime session on the Sunday, after which we will all troll off home - with the ashes secured of course!
This has been a long time coming, so put the date in your diary. It promises to be the event of the year.

Painted Puppets Clockwork Clowns Painted Lips That Make No Sound
We are sorry to announce that after 18 years of illustrious catship, the Glorious Chairman Meeooow finally passed away on December 18th last. Despite the best efforts of a team of surgeons, he was taken from among us by a tumour, and lay down the burden of office in order to pursue a discorporeal retirement in the celestial rubbish-tip, wherein vermin flourish, piles of old fish rot and fester, and the pigeons are overweight and have no wings. Fortunately, a daft old bat named La Dame de Doubtance has established contact with his spirit, and will be channelling his thoughts through her wizened hands and shrivelled brain for your continuing delight and instruction.

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